What Do I Want To Do With My Life

Some potentials for focus:
health - jiu jitsu, if not that, then running, if not that, then exercise bike and weights
family - call a few times a month, share photos, text, plan trips to visit, plan experiences together
friends - hangout on video games, see each other in real life, dinner parties
work - public health, transitioning to financial independence via investments, transitioning to writing, transitioning to building writing career

writer, author, poet, comic

healthy - above for physical, mental is writing as well, emotionally is social stuff, relationship with wife
wealthy - investments and business
wise - writing, talking to people, reading books

basics: exercise, social
writing as an art and being well-known for it
providing value to people with it
writing about stuff that energizes me and resonates with me and providing huge amounts of value to people through it. that is my media. that is my build and sell.
public health? there is little recognition there, and little way to make money. but that might just be from lack of, well, lack of wanting to do it.
i value the experiences of being around new people, learning from new people, helping people one-on-one, with public health
it is harder to do it abstractly, for me.
it requires leadership

i think what i am looking for is achievement and recognition
happiness and enjoyment

But the thing is you kind of need all of them

The overarching thing? Happiness.

If you do not have happiness, you lose. Well, no, but if you have happiness, you win.

Happiness is a word that is co-opted and shaded to mean many things. But what I mean is a combination of peace, joy, love, positive energy.

Less a combination of adrenaline, ego, domination. Althought those are enjoyable emotions, they are not long-term good emotions. You eventually wear them out or they break your system.

Right on the heels of happiness are achievement. Achievement is something good in the world. At scale.

Now if I could have all three, I would also guarantee recognition for achievement. But in all the recognition I have achieved I learned a few lessons. Recognition is fleeting, it is excellent to have, you can use it to build things up or play at higher game, but it comes after the fact, ex post facto.

Additionally, you can game it, but ultimately you cannot control it. And if you had to pick one. You could pick and work on achievement and expect recognition. But a combination? Well that is a skill as well.

So now, what do I do?

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